Did the St Paddy's day 5 mile today, which is a great race - it was a gorgeous morning but I was very nervous from the start. I was hoping to run under 30 min but it became obvious at about Mile 2.5 that that wasn't going to happen this time. I was on pace at what DC had suggested I go for for the first two miles, but died soon after crossing the bridge and heading home into the wind. It wasn't really that bad a wind, but seemed strong enough to make a difference and affect me, both mentally and physically. I just felt tired and heavy-legged.
So I finished 5th lady overall and 2nd in my age group, with a 31.07 - I haven't ever run a 5 mile, and considering no women ran sub-30 maybe I shouldn't be too upset, but it would have been nice, and a good ego boost. As a result, it was a bit of a call to action, as I obviously need to work a bit harder while I am over here. I definitely think that the time in the gym, while possibly helping keep me fit, has not been the equivalent to as much running as I normally do. And that I have been skimping on the distance, and the hard stuff, all of which has added up over the past months. Throw in the extra eating and the less daily exercise/movement, and you have one slow(er) Mariah!
I know I shouldn't be too broken up about it, as there have been lots of circumstances that have made things difficult over this time period, but at the same time, it is frustrating, and the working out, or at least the putting in of effort, is within my control.
The good thing is that I have found some options that will hopefully help motivate me - the running folks around here are obviously driven and will provide some challenges for me, as well as help take out some of the mundane workouts I have been doing. So onward and upward, right??
Dad and L came out to watch and cheer, as did the I family - it was great to have support, and definitely helped about 3 miles when I was thinking about DNFing b/c I was frustrated. It was hard work for dad to get out and about, no doubt, and stand in the cold, plus he hadn't slept well since he was nervous for me running!!
All else is going okay - it is countdown to holiday time, which will be good, and a challenge we haven't faced yet - I am hoping that the weather will be nice and warm, and we can just all relax and have a change of scenery. It seems to have been a bit tense here lately. Dad still isn't eating well and has been losing weight again, and it frustrates him and us, I think, that he can't force stuff in. We were supposed to have appointments this week for scans and stuff but they have been postponed until after the trip; I suppose this is good in a way b/c like we want to have bad news hanging over our heads for the trip. But I am anxious to see how, if at all, things have changed since last time - there definitely seems to have been a dip, so I hope that it is nothing too concerning.
Life here was a bit more mellow this week - maybe I just chilled out a bit, or have some other vices that are helping me stay sane. I have been sewing a lot, which is fun - I am not very good, but I enjoy it, and it keeps my mind elsewhere. Getting out of the house is always good, and helpful. I don't know, it ebbs and flows. Ultimately, I know this is the right thing, and I need to be okay with it - this time is invaluable, so I just have to make the most of it for myself personally, and know that this is where i need to be right now.
Me and one of my top fans!
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